With A Different Beginning Comes Change
by shy1214
Summary: come see what a different start to their relationship leads to
1. Chapter 1

First day of 8th grade point place Wisconsin.

Steven Hyde checked his class schedule one last time to be sure he had the right room and pushed the door open with a sigh, he hadn't slept worth crap and could think of a lot of places he'd rather be than school. He briefly hoped that this year maybe the teacher would assign a book that didn't make him want to wretch, but seven previous years told him it wasn't going to happen.

He looked around the half full room for a seat he could stand to spend the next nine months in and eventually decided on one in the second to last row (never pick the last row, the teachers notice you faster there), it was near the window, scenery could help the day pass more smoothly. The down side was that his new seat was a little too close to a group of chattering preppie looking girls, he was already gritting his teeth at their laughter, but refused to move away from them – it was a sign of weakness to give up that quickly.

He was half way through a very nice day dream about getting to go back stage at a zeppelin concert and meet his idols, when one of the giggling girls took the seat right next to him and turned her attention away from her cronies and inexplicably, onto him?

"hi" she said so brightly he winced "my names Jackie Burkhart, what's yours?" she asked with a 1000-watt smile.

Luckily his shades protected him from the glare.

"Hyde" he replied shortly,

"from what?" his new neighbor asked with a frown,

Hyde rolled his eyes and sighed "no man, my names Hyde H-Y-D-E, get it?" he asked a little more annoyed than he'd intended.

"oh" she said nodding that she got it "what's your last name?" she asked then

"that is my last name"

"well then what's your first name?" she asked looking confused

"none of your business" he informed her curtly

"you know that I'll find out in about five minutes, anyway right?" she asked with a good-natured grin, somehow, he still hadn't managed to scare her off.

"will you now?" he asked thinking she was issuing a challenge

She copied his own smirk and spoke one word "rollcall"

Shit! He thought angrily, she was right!

"Steven, but do not ever call me that" he told her with the growl he used to intimidate pretty much everyone around him, it had never failed him.

Until now.

"do you want a banana Steven?" she asked totally impervious to his intimidation.

He eyed the yellow fruit she held out suspiciously

"no" he told her flatly, saved from further conversation by the teacher calling them to order.

As he suspected earlier, the teachers first act was to assign them reading material that made him want to commit arson. Why did English teachers all love Shakespeare so much? Was it like in a contract they all signed?!

Whatever the reason he was none too pleased to be on the hook to read and interoperate a play of his choosing over the next week, to make matters even worse the class had been split into partners for the project, not to mention the rest of the damn school year! And wouldn't you know who he'd been teamed up with?

"so, Steven, I was thinking we could pick Romeo and Juliet" Jackie said as she followed him out of class without asking if he minded.

"no way in hell" he snapped angrily, Shakespeare was bad enough, but he had a special hatred for the play she spoke of, stupid romantic bullshit!

"that's fine, do you like taming of the shrew? It's a lot funnier than Romeo and Juliet, Macbeth has a murder in it if that makes it more interesting" she chattered on, oblivious to the fact he was trying to lose her in the crowded hallway while he searched for his history class, but she followed along without trouble all the way there.

"look Jackie, I don't care what play we read, I don't want to read any of them so it doesn't really matter, as long as it's not that sappy love story crap it doesn't matter what you pick for us ok?" he finally yelled at her,

She'd followed him all the way into his history class and talked away at him while he searched for a seat, until he'd lost his temper and yelled. He felt a little bit bad for yelling, he hadn't meant to, he just wanted her to stop.

She stared at him for a moment looking shocked and hurt that he'd been so mean over such a small thing, he didn't know what to say? He was so put off by the expression on her face that he couldn't even remember how an apology was phrased.

She sank into the seat beside him and hid her face, but he could see her tiny shoulders shaking slightly and he felt like a total dick. He hadn't meant to make her cry, yeah, she was being annoying but…he hadn't meant to make her cry.

"hey uh, Jackie…um, this class is about to start your going to be late for yours if you don't get going" he muttered awkwardly.

She raised her head from her arms but didn't look in his direction. She did however, reach into her bag and pull out the same history text book he'd been issued for the class.

Well hell, he really did have some kind of luck, didn't he?

It was hard to tell from her profile, but he was pretty sure it was obvious she'd been crying, and if history was anything to go by, he was going to be in deep shit as soon as the teacher spotted the nicely dressed girl next to him with tear stained cheeks. Sure enough, their teacher was already making his way towards Jackie, and as luck would have it, it was Mr. brooks - who he'd had last year and already hated him! Yay….

"is he bothering you miss Burkhart?" Mr. brooks asked in a falsely kind voice

Jackie looked up at the teacher with big confused eyed

"who sir?" she asked him blankly

"Steven Hyde" he said, shooting Hyde a dark suspicious glare

"why would Steven be bothering me?" she asked tilting her head to side in confusion.

Mr. brooks stuttered uncomfortably as he tried to find the right words to explain why girls like Jackie should avoid a boy like Hyde, it was hilarious and it was all Hyde could do not to let it show on his face.

"a spider crawled on my leg and scared me, Steven killed it for me though" she lied like a pro, and Hyde was impressed he had to admit.

"oh, well in that case…class is about to start you two so get your notebooks out" he told them sternly and walked back to his desk.

"thanks" Hyde whispered

"whatever" Jackie replied disinterestedly,

The need for an apology grew, Hyde knew very well that one word from her just then could have made his life a living hell, but she'd lied for him after he'd yelled at her? He didn't understand helping people after they'd been a jerk, but he did know that he was wrong and he should say something.

He decided he'd find her before the end of the day which would give him time to work out what he would say, but when he walked out of history she was still there at his side?

"Jackie" he asked with a dawning suspicion "what's your next class?"

She glanced at her schedule "pre – algebra room 115" she read off with a shrug.

Hyde groaned inwardly but didn't let it show, that was his next class too. He didn't want to be a jerk again so soon after she'd saved his ass but how many classes was he going to be in with the tiny chatterbox?!

A lot as it turned out.

Besides English and history, Hyde came to find that he had also math, social studies and lunch with her, she wasn't in his gym class or science or homeroom – which he only found out the next day, since he hadn't shown up the first day – but that meant that most of his day was spent around Jackie, and for some reason he couldn't fathom, she took a seat next to him in every class.

She would start each day by offering him a banana – which he refused sullenly, then she'd chatter on about their project - that he had done nothing for so far, and she would keep talking as she followed him to history. This kept up until he managed to slip away before lunch, she'd caught his eye the second day when she'd seen him in the lunch room, and he'd been sure she would do what she'd done in all their mutual classes, and just take a seat next to him like she owned it, but she hadn't?

He was surprised but a little relieved, she was a lot – all the time, so so much talking and somehow that he couldn't put his finger on exactly? She took up a lot more of a room than made sense from a scientific viewpoint, she wasn't even five feet tall and yet when she walked into a room she was all you could see? It must be her multi colored wardrobe? Or maybe how loud her voice was?

Hyde knew that none of those reasons were the answer, it was something else but he didn't know what yet. What he did know was that no matter how bad he felt about yelling at her, it was going to happen again and soon, if she didn't let up on all the Romeo and Juliet talk! He hadn't spoken to her apart from turning down her offer of a banana every day, but that didn't stop her from keeping up an almost constant stream of speech towards him!

She would recite parts of the play, theorize about the motivations of the characters, throw out several different thoughts on what the meanings behind certain aspects were, all while Hyde glared, grimaced and rolled his eyes.

He was already stressed out from how bad it was at home at the moment, and Jackie's constant talk was pushing him past the brink. And then after a particularly bad night with Edna and his newest 'uncle', Hyde walked into English class, tired and pissed off. He sat heavily in his seat and closed his eyes behind his shades, a little rest and he'd be able to make it through the day without losing it, his temper was so much worse when he hadn't slept.

"good morning Steven! Do you want a banana? So, the project – "she began in her usual chirpy voice and wide smile and Hyde snapped.

"no! god, what is wrong with you?! Every freakin' day you ask me and every day I say no, what does it take for you to back the hell off?! And in case you haven't noticed I don't give a damn about the stupid project man! Just leave me alone Jackie!" he demanded angrily, glaring at her like he loathed her very existence.

Jackie stared back in shock, she was aware that, she was a lot more energetic than most people, but if she had done something to deserve his outburst she had no idea what?

She bit her lip to keep from crying, but it was no use. He watched with a sinking feeling as her eyes (that he just now noticed were different colors) filled with tears, and he heard everything he'd just said to her replay in his head and he would have kicked his own ass if he could!

His mouth opened and closed like a dying fish, while he tried to think of something – anything to say to her to stop her crying, and not just because he'd get in trouble over it. But he didn't get a chance, because before he could say a damn thing, Mr. brooks was calling them to come up and present their project?

Hyde felt his stomach drop, was it time already? How had he run out of time without even starting to work on it? They were totally screwed! He glanced at Jackie and his jaw dropped, she had pulled herself together in a flash and pulled a file folder out of her bag. Head held high she marched to the front of the class with him slinking along behind her, opening the folder she handed him a piece of paper with a large print title at the top 'counter points'?

She began speaking with the ease of someone not afraid of public speaking, and turned to him when it was his turn to read off his sheet, it was a subtle que and he knew he didn't deserve it. When he started reading his part it became clear that she had used his annoyed reactions for whatever she'd been talking about and turned them into actual counterpoints to her statements? He was in awe.

Not just of how much work she'd put in without his help, but of how well she had done the actual work, she had turned his gut reactions into coherent words that backed up a point of view, it was like spinning straw into gold. But not only that, but she had also managed to make his part sound enough like him that it seemed like he'd done his part of the project? How but more importantly why?

He'd been nothing but rude to her since the moment they'd met a week before, but here he was standing in front of a teacher who hated him, not in danger of getting an F.

Finally, it was over, and they took their seats while the next team took the place, Hyde looked over at Jackie and saw that she was purposefully ignoring him. He had it coming and he knew it, but he still didn't like it.

He completely ignored the rest of the presenters and thought over what he had to do – what he could do, to thank her and maybe…say…sorry.

As soon as class ended though, Jackie was up and heading towards the door like there'd been a starting shot he'd missed?

"hey Jackie, wait up!" he called out, hating how lame he sounded. He half expected her to ignore him like he deserved but in testament to her character she stopped and waited for him as he'd asked.

"what do you want Hyde?" she asked coldly

"I wanted to say um…." He really, really sucked at this crap.

"I'm going to be late" she pointed out still in the unfriendly tone he'd earned now.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you this morning, and the other time, I don't have anything to say for myself, and I wanted to thank you for saving my ass with the project" he explained, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck while he spoke.

"I was just trying to remind you the project was due today and give you your part so you could read through it, why did you yell at me like that?" she asked with a noticeable wobble in her bottom lip.

God, he was a piece of crap, a stupid short-sighted piece of crap.

"I didn't get much sleep last night and I sometimes lose my temper over dumb shit when I'm tired" he explained his pathetic reason, feeling like he wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

Jackie was staring at him – hard, her face was impossible for him to read and he felt a little nervous?

"I do that too" she finally said, in a voice full of far more understanding than he deserved.

"oh?" he didn't know what to say?

"I was just trying to be friends Hyde, but I get it that you don't like me and don't want to be friends, so…bye" she said looking small for the first time since he'd met her, and it was his fault.

"I'm allergic to bananas" he in a rush as Jackie was turning to leave.

"huh?" she asked turning back to him with a startled expression.

"that's why I always say no when you ask if I want one, I'm allergic, I get like this weird hive rash thing if I even touch one" he wasn't sure why he was telling her all this?

"why didn't you just tell me that, instead of being all angry about it every day?" she asked reasonably

"I don't know?" he shrugged awkwardly

"we should get to class Hyde" she pointed out

"you uh…you can call me Steven" he told her praying to whoever would listen that he wasn't blushing.

The smallest smile touched her face, and she nodded slightly without making a big deal about it before turning and gesturing him to follow her to math class.

"so, Steven" she began closer to her usual happy tone "do you want an orange?" she asked grinning and holding out the fruit to him.

He couldn't help but laugh, "sure" he accepted and took the orange from her hand, then raised a curious eyebrow "how much fruit do you carry at a given time?" he asked

"a lot" she admitted wryly

"is your ambition to be a fruit vendor or something?"

"it's every little girls dream Steven" she said totally serious, before bursting into laughter at the look on his face "I need the sugar is all, I don't know if you've noticed but I burn through a lot of energy and if I don't eat some fruit every little while I get sort of sick? So, my maid loads me up with fruit every day, and I didn't know how else to try and make friends with you" she explained

Hyde thoughtfully pealed his orange while they walked, he had to admit that if you took his tendency to be irritated at school out of the equation, Jackie wasn't bad at all.

"I'm in" he told her casually

"what now?" she said not getting what he was saying

"being friends, I'm in" he elaborated

"you are?" she said, stopping in her tracks and staring up at him looking far more hopeful than the prospect of being friends with the likes of him warranted.

"hey man, if you could write my half of our project just from the looks I gave you when you said stuff that means you get me better than almost anyone I've ever known. And even though I've been a royal jerk to you since we met a week ago, you've had my back more than once which makes you a lot cooler than most people I've known too, so how about it, friends?" he asked holding out his hand to her.

The brightest smile he'd seen on her face yet appeared and her tiny hand clasped his firmly

"friends" she agreed happily


	2. Chapter 2

A/N so I put chapter 1 out in a rush 'cus I had errands to run, and even if I hadn't the punctuation still would have sucked. In my defense, and this isn't a very good defense, I was home schooled and most of my study in English was vocabulary for some reason? Also, dictation, because we all know how often that comes up in this day and age…

At any rate, I don't have a beta and even if someone offered I probably still wouldn't because I don't have much time to devote to writing fan fiction, I have like – four hours on Thursday mornings to whip out a chapter, so please bear with me and take me as I am.

Time passage in the coming chapters will come in chunks to speed progress, also to keep me from getting bored.

Point place middle school, half way through the school year, the stand of trees behind the library

"so, what are you doing this weekend?" Jackie asked when she couldn't stand looking at the history book held on her knees anymore.

Hyde looked over from where he'd been laying in the shade "same thing I do most weekends, go hang out in the basement to avoid quality time with Edna, and you?" he asked with false brightness

Jackie shot him a hard look "so you're going to go hang out with the friends that you're ashamed to let know I exist?" she asked with dangerous calm.

He let out the same sigh he did every time she brought this subject up "I'm not ashamed of you Jackie, I've told you that roughly 627 times, and I've meant it every one of them, also, they know were friends" he told her firmly

"then why don't you ever invite me to go with you? If you're not ashamed of being friends with me what's stopping you?" she demanded indignantly

Hyde couldn't help but laugh softly, she really didn't get it.

"well I am ashamed, but not of you jacks. More like, I'm ashamed of them and I don't really want to make you deal with them." he explained thoughtfully, the more he thought about it the more he decided that what he'd told her was the truth, he hated the idea of his friends picking on Jackie and he had no doubts they would.

"if they're that bad why are they your friends?" she frowned trying to understand what he was saying.

"it's not that they're bad, it's that they're how they are and aren't very good at dealing with change" he knew what he meant, he just didn't quite know how to explain it to someone who hadn't known his other friends for as long as he had?

"I don't get it" she admitted irritably, she hated when she couldn't understand things which was probably why she studied so hard.

"see, it's like this – say I took you over there? They'd be weird and suspicious and either grill you like a war criminal or act like you weren't there, and I don't want you to deal with either scenario" he told her seriously

"so, you're trying to protect me?" she asked smiling sweetly at him

"I never said that" he denied flatly

"you care about me" she sing - songed at him

It was a repeated argument of theirs, where she would claim he would be lost without her and he would respond that he was only slightly less pissed off when they hung out. Privately Jackie feared that Hyde hung out with her at school out of guilt for what a jerk he'd been the first week, whereas Hyde was afraid Jackie would drop him any minute for how different their social standing was.

"admit it Steven" she said throwing an apple at him from out of the depths of her bag "without me your life would be colorless and drab, like the Kansas part of the wizard of Oz"

"I wouldn't go that far, but I'd definitely have a greater risk of scurvy" he smirked, biting into the apple she'd used as a missile.

The smirk slid off his face when he saw the expression on hers, trouble was brewing and Jackie could make an impressive amount of trouble if she chose.

"at first, I was just kidding, but we've been friends for a few months now and you still keep me far away from your other friends, it's starting to make me think you really are embarrassed to be friends with someone like me and that hurts" she told him with a vulnerable honesty he wasn't accustomed to, his other friends didn't talk like that, well maybe Eric?

"this is one of those things where I have to prove what I'm saying isn't it?" he asked suspiciously, he had a sinking feeling like the only thing that would satisfy Jackie about the whole thing was going with him to the basement.

"you don't have to do anything Steven, I'm just going to wonder about it otherwise" she said with a shrug, she already knew better than to pressure him about anything, the stronger you went at Hyde the harder he dug in his heels.

"this is a bad, bad, bad idea" he muttered darkly then took a deep breath "do you want to come with me to the basement and meet the gang?" he asked with another sigh.

"how long would we have to be there?" she asked with narrowed eyes

Hyde gaped at her "you just spent ten minutes making me feel like a dick for not having invited you there and now you're trying to set a time limit?!" he cried in disbelief

"well" she began

"no, no 'well'" he cut her off "what gives Jackie?" he asked seriously

"nothing" she tried to claim, but she was doing that thing where she couldn't look him full in the eye.

"you can tell me Jackie" he promised

She toyed nervously with the end of one pigtail while she worked up the courage to talk.

"I'm not cool like you, and if you see me around all your friends that are more like you you're going to start to think I'm lame" she murmured in a scared voice, he sometimes forgot how young she was because of how smart she was, but that was part of the problem. Jackie had skipped a grade, she was actually a year younger than him, 13 to his 14 and sometimes it showed.

"you think I'd let them tease you?" he asked highly offended

"I don't know?" she mumbled

"not a chance Jackie! I won't let anyone mess with you, you got that?!" he demanded, forcing her to look up and meet his gaze.

"but they're your best friends" Jackie tried to remind him of how things were,

"you are too" he told her with considerable effort, he wasn't good with emotions that weren't anger.

That got him the smile he'd wanted.

"Saturday at about noon, meet me at the park and we'll go to the basement for a while, if it's too boring or if you just don't like it there, I promise we'll go somewhere else and hang out until you have to go home" he told her in the voice she couldn't refuse.

"ok" she agreed softly, her stomach churning at the idea of meeting his friends now that it was becoming a reality.

Saturday came and Jackie accompanied him to the basement, it started off mildly enough – he introduced her to his friends as 'his friend Jackie' and they barely acknowledged her presence until the commercial break.

When they did turn their collective attention to the new arrival in their midst it wasn't what he'd been hoping for. Kelso was learning at her like she was the first girl he'd ever seen and it was putting Hyde on edge, he hadn't brought Jackie over as a gift for Kelso and he was willing to go to drastic lengths to make that point known. Donna seemed to react to another girl's presence as a threat to her standing as the pretty girl who hung out with boys, and Eric…well actually he hadn't really done anything but wave 'hi' and ask if she was in his social studies class, she was.

"so, Jodie, what are you doing tonight?" Kelso asked giving her his 'suave' look Hyde knew for a fact he practiced in the mirror, it looked more like he was having a stroke though.

"it's Jackie" she replied flatly "and none of your business"

"gee, thanks again Hyde for bringing your new friend here" Donna said sarcastically

Hyde glanced at donna with a curious expression "and your reason for getting an attitude is?" he asked unconcerned with Donnas reaction, since over the years she'd shown her penchant for making a big deal out of nearly nothing.

"oh, I don't know? Maybe that you're subjecting us to some pep squad kid without asking any of us first and now you're just sitting back while she's a brat to Kelso who's just being friendly!" Donna said in her most sanctimonious tone, one that never failed to put him from 0 to pissed in under 30 seconds, and this time she was insulting his friend like she wasn't even there.

Ask their permission to bring a friend with him?! Who the hell did she think she was talking to him like that?! He was about to say some things that would seriously change their dynamic when Eric spoke up.

"he doesn't have to ask our permission to have other friends Donna, that's kind of weird if he did" Eric told her in his awkwardly nervous way,

"I didn't say he needed to ask us if he had other friends, but he can't just bring them here and force us to put up with them without checking with us!" she told him forcefully,

"seems to me that what's really going on is I'm forcing Jackie to put up with you dill holes" Hyde said angrily

"its fine Steven" Jackie said getting up from the couch and brushing off her denim skirt, it killed him a little to notice how much effort she'd put into looking nice to visit their crappy hang out. She'd approached it like a special occasion that required careful thought, he knew the purple sweater was new because he'd never seen it before and something about the thought that she'd gone to any amount of trouble to come there and be treated this way, was infuriating him.

"yeah, screw this. Come on Jackie let's get out of here" he said getting up and placed his hand on the small of her back to lead her out of the basement.

At the door Jackie stopped with her hand on the door knob and turned to his friends,

"thank you for having me over Eric" she said politely and walked out the door.

Hyde glared at them before following her up the stairs, he was not going to forget this.

"so" Jackie began while they walked down the street in the general direction of her house "that could have gone better" she noted mildly

"I tried to warn you" Hyde fumed, not angry with her but still too mad to keep it out of his voice

"yeah, you did" she admitted with a sad smile "I guess I just don't understand what I did to make Donna be so mean?" she said with a frown that made him want to do violent things to people.

"you didn't do anything Jackie, she's just like that. She always has to be in charge and act like she's smarter and more grown up than us, most of the time I ignore her crap 'cus it's easier but for some reason she got to me today" he said, sounding confused by his own reactions.

"I still don't get it, but also I wanted to thank you for sticking up for me with your friend Michael, he was…he scared me a little" she admitted in a small voice,

She was only to the point with liking boys of wanting to hold hands, so when Kelso had started paying too much attention to her and started sitting closer and closer to her she'd started to panic silently, but Hyde had noticed and he'd stepped up to protect her and she was grateful.

"don't mention it – really, I mean that, and don't you ever sit there silently if you're scared or uncomfortable ever again! What if I'm not there to notice and step in and some creep pulls something like Kelso did?! Are you going to just take that crap because you don't want people to think you're a brat?! Who the hell gives a damn what people think?! Listen to me Jackie, people liking you isn't ever worth doing things you're uncomfortable with" he told her so seriously he barely seemed like himself.

"I didn't mean to" she whimpered looking scared and remorseful, which wasn't what he was going for.

"no man, you didn't do anything wrong! that's the whole point, you didn't deserve how Kelso was acting, you didn't do anything that caused it. Just because you looked pretty doesn't give him the right to put the moves on you, you always look pretty so you're going to have to learn to be heard and stand up for yourself and if guys still won't back off I'll be there to kick some ass!" he vowed darkly

"you think I look pretty?" she asked shyly, but a happy little smile was lurking at the corner of her mouth.

Hyde gave her a hard look "that's the part you retained?" he asked disbelievingly

"I heard the rest" she defended herself and crossed her arms defiantly

Hyde groaned, he had a sudden flash of insight that this girl might very well be the end of him, but he didn't mind too much.

"if I admit you look pretty can we stop standing in the street talking and go to your house already?" he asked wearily, the whole day so far had been exhausted.

"yes" she told him with a nod of her perfectly braided head

"fine!" he growled and took a deep breath "Jackie – as you well know already – you look…very…pretty today" he ground the words out through his teeth with obvious discomfort, his face took on a reddish tint that Jackie wisely chose not to comment on, especially since the added 'very' was all his own.

"come on Steven, let's go see if Gladys will let us have a snack this close to dinner" she said suggested happily and took off down the street again, Hyde thanked whatever higher power had his back for Jackie not pushing the conversation further and followed her to her house.

Jackie returning to the basement never came up in conversation after that day, Hyde didn't want her subjected to his other friends (who he was on less than amicable terms with for the moment) and Jackie would never again put herself willingly within range of Michael Kelso if she had a choice in the matter. After that day in the basement he had developed a belief that he and Jackie had something between them, and tried his best to get her attention almost every day.

His arm was now habitually covered in bruises from Hyde's attempts to explain leaving Jackie alone was in his best interest. Donna was rude and snotty to Jackie whenever they were in the same place and Eric was just twitchy in general. but his basement friends eventually adopted the belief that since they didn't physically see Jackie and Hyde spend time together, that they must not be friends anymore.

When he told Jackie about it she laughed so hard she fell over on the couch in her den.

"oh, we are sooooo letting this ride!" she had chortled

"we are?" he asked with a raised eyebrow, he didn't see the humor that she did.

"we are, we must! It's our civic duty to let them act like total morons!" she cried animatedly

"that's not what 'civic' means Jackie" he pointed out

"stop ruining my fun Steven! I refuse to miss out on watching them look that stupid!" she ordered him with one pink painted nail pointing dangerously at him, he could only nod agreement.

Neither of them knew then how long the whole thing would end up going on, if they had they might have chosen a different course of action. But then again, not being hassled because his friends only saw what they wanted to, had its perks.

Unfortunately for the two, three teenagers in a basement weren't the worst of their problems.

It wasn't long into their friendship that they learned they had something major in common, neither of them had a happy and secure home life. When Jackie learned just how bad Edna was she cried, but when Hyde found out about Jackie's parents it was only her big pleading eyes that kept his temper in check.

They banded together for support, because there wasn't much else they could do. When Edna brought home some sleaze bag who eyed Hyde in a way he wasn't in a hurry to decipher, he climbed out the window and walked to Jackie's where she let him in without making him explain.

And when Jackie's parents got into one of their many drunken fights where she couldn't hide from the screamed accusations of infidelity among much else, she called Hyde, before she knew it he was there climbing through her window and bustling her into her walk-in closet where they had a little den built in the very back. With the door closed she couldn't hear her parents as much and 14-year-old Hyde would awkwardly hold her and tell her it would all be ok.

If someone had told him at the beginning of the school year that a tiny, multi colored pixie would become the most important thing in his life, he would have laughed in their face, but here he was and he wasn't going back. Jackie being in pain made him miserable, and no matter how dark his mood got or how angry he became, Jackie's smile could disperse it.

They spent the majority of summer vacation together at Jackie's house, her parents had gone to Europe and left her in the care of the maid Gladys, who thankfully trusted that Hyde didn't have any ulterior motives in his friendship with Jackie, so let him stay as much as he wanted.

When school started again they faced the first day of high school side by side, and breathed identical sighs of relief when they compared schedules and found they would be together for most of the day. They had grown very close – codependent if you wanted to be a jerk about it – and preferred being together to any other scenario. Which led to a slightly awkward conversation when Jackie pointed out a little sadly, that no boys ever asked her out.

"that's probably my fault jacks" Hyde admitted between eating French fries, he'd noticed the same thing but wasn't as confused about it as she was.

"how? Are you going person to person and telling them not to ask me on a date?" she asked curiously, she could picture him doing that to protect her, he took that particular role very seriously.

"I think we both know I'm too lazy for that kind of thing" he smirked

"then how is it your fault?" she pressed

He'd been dreading a talk like this because he feared that the truth would push her away and he wasn't prepared to give up their friendship.

"because they all see us together all the time and even though everyone knows were not together like that, they're probably scared to approach you because of me" he told her

"why would they be scared? I'm not very scary Steven" she just wasn't getting it

"well you can be, but I meant me, guys don't approach you because they're afraid of me" he went for the blunt approach this time.

"you're not scary" she argued, with the high esteem of him that he treasured.

"not to you, but to most people around school I'm a scary dude and they probably think that if they date you and you get upset in any way ill appear and rip them apart" Hyde explained patiently, then seemed to consider what he'd just said, "which is true" he added with a shrug.

"so, what your saying is that while I hang out with you I'll never date?" she asked sounding scandalized

"it's starting to look that way, 'cus believe me – it's not that they're not interested in you jacks" he assured her

"that sucks" she stated bluntly

"I could always hang around less to make them think it's safe to talk to you?" he offered, trying hard to be noble for her benefit.

"no! I don't need to date right now, but I do need you Steven, you know that don't you?" she asked clutching his hand fearfully, she couldn't stand even the thought of losing her scruffy bad tempered best friend.

"yeah, I do jacks, right back at'cha" he said reassuringly

"you know, it wouldn't harm you to say you care about me" she told him pointedly

"you'd think that, but it would actually" he teased

"dammit Steven!" she snapped, glaring at him for being so difficult about such an important thing.

"calm down Jackie, I don't have to say it all time for you to be the most important thing in my life" he told her casually, and Jackie wisely chose to leave it at that. She knew, even though he wouldn't admit it often, that he would always be there for her because she was his priority just like he was hers.

So, when Jackie called one night in tears, Hyde didn't hesitate to rush to her side, totally disregarding the snow storm in his path. He climbed to her window with practiced skill and crossed to where she was huddled crying as fast as possible.

"jacks you gotta tell me what's wrong, you're scaring me" he murmured softly to his distraught best friend. Jackie threw her arms around him in a death grip and sobbed against his shoulder.

He'd never seen her this upset and it was freaking him out!

"Jackie, please calm down and tell me what's going on?" he pleaded gently

"they were fighting" she choked out between racking sobs

"ok? That's not new" he said confused

"th-this t-time they said something awful Steven!" she cried, pulling away enough to look him in the eye.

Hyde felt his stomach drop to his feet and his heart joined it, whatever had happened was worse than he'd thought, he was sure. He smoothed the damp hair away from her face tenderly.

"what did they say jacks?" he asked trying to be brave

"they decided were moving away" she whispered desolately, and collapsed against his chest again.

He was dying, there was no way he could possibly survive this feeling! All he could do was wrap his arms around Jackie and hold her tight while his life came to an end.

A/N don't worry, it's not over. But be warned that the next chapter starts in a different place, but that's all I'm saying!


	3. Chapter 3

Hyde stared up at the entrance to the high school, he was about to start his junior year and he didn't give a damn. His hand involuntarily reached to his pocket and felt the folded paper in it.

'dear Steven, I can't believe we aren't starting school together this year. I miss you so much, you have no idea! This city is HUGE! And I'm already small and it makes it worse, I feel like a flee on a really big dog, that's what it should be called here, big apple my perfect ass! I hate it, I hate our new place, it's an apartment not a house which means that there are people all around me all the time and its always so loud, which doesn't matter because I don't have anyone to talk to anyway.

Daddies new job has him busy all the time, and mom is always out with her new friends trying to 'secure a place in the best social circles' and I can't make any friends here because here, I'm the 'poor' kid as far as all these stuck up bitches are concerned, which reminds me, I want you to go tell anyone and I mean anyone who I ever made feel like they're making me feel and tell them I'm sorry, I'm so sorry I ever acted like that. I miss you Steven, I miss you more than I miss my room and even though it failed spectacularly it was really sweet of you to try and talk my dad into letting me stay.

Please write me back Steven, I'm so lonely and I miss you and I miss home and I hate it here! I wish you could come get me, I wish I could drive then I'd steal the car and run away! Sorry about all that, I shouldn't dump on you, be up on Thursday at midnight your time I'm going to try my damndest to call your house, as you're aware I'm not allowed to call you after your beautiful display of loyalty on the front lawn, but they're going to be at a gala and won't know what I'm doing, so you better be up to answer my call! You're my best friend Steven and I hate not being there with you, be up on Thursday.

Love forever your Jackie

He'd read it so many times it was starting to seem a little sad even to him, but it was all he had of her now that she'd been taken away from him. His other friends had forgotten Jackie as soon as she'd left, and he felt his heart crack a little more every time someone seemed relieved she was gone, and even worse when they so quickly forgot someone he couldn't go two seconds without thinking of! His whole world was shit and then he'd found Jackie, she acted like he was the greatest thing she'd ever seen and it made him start to think that he could maybe become the person she believed him to be.

Hyde was never a happy guy, there was just too much experience with how bad things could and did get for him to function like other kids did, he knew, he knew what it was like to be out of money before your paycheck was even cashed, he knew what it was like to train yourself to not feel hungry because you knew that it didn't matter what you felt. He had friends sure, but it wasn't the same, it wasn't Jackie, and he missed her so bad he didn't know how to handle it so he was just pissed all the time.

Not a lot of people noticed though, he'd never been exactly sunny in his disposition so when he became…difficult, it flew under the radar. Only Forman noticed anything at all, and he was too twitchy to confront him about the change in him, but it was there. Whereas before people had been nervous of Hyde and given him a wide berth, there was active fear of him now, part of this was that ever since a certain Lincoln had driven away from point place, Hyde would fight at the least provocation, his temper was always so close to the surface that the entire student body avoided him and he spent a lot of time sitting at the police station, waiting for Edna to pick him up.

His original friends stuck with him, but all that really meant was that they hung out with him in the basement and traded burns and smoked weed, Forman made a few attempts to get Hyde to open up and tell him why he was just pissed off all the damn time!

'dear Jackie, I know I just talked to you for a whole two minutes but, I still miss you. I don't know why man, but I'm so fucking pissed all the time and I don't know what to do? I wish you were here, and I wish I wasn't so mad, I wish a lot of things, I just miss you. Hope you can call again soon'

Your friend Steven

But she never got to call him again, her mom noticed the one long distance charge and had a very stern talk with her about leaving the past behind and not caring about people who don't matter. Jackie ignored everything her mom said except for the calling part, no paper trail. She kept on writing him letters, and her heart jumped every time she received a letter from Gladys that had Hyde's within it. She hadn't been exaggerating when she told him she hated New York, Jackie despised it but she was honest enough with herself to admit she only hated most of it because she wanted her friend back.

She came so close once too

'hey, jacks you're never going to believe this! I met this chick Chrissy and she wants me to leave point place with her, to New York! Once I'm there there's not a damn thing your dad can do to keep me away, I'm packing as soon as I mail this, you and me jacks, soon.'

Jackie read the words with such happiness it almost drowned out the peculiar pang she felt when she read that he'd met a girl, was he replacing her without realizing it? She shook her head to banish the thought, no – he wouldn't write her sounding exited to be reunited if he had replaced her, that didn't make any sense.

She waited on tenterhooks for word of his arrival, she had spent so much time scouting things they could do together that her parents thought she was finally embracing the city. And then it came – another letter from Steven.

'hey jacks, I thought I'd be there with you by now but the Forman's found out I was going to leave, I'm pretty sure donna made Forman rat me out, anyway, kitty cried and red gave me some speech that made me see that as much as I want to be there with you, I wouldn't have a job or a place to stay and let's face it, your parents still hate me so they probably wouldn't let you hang out with me any way. It was a nice dream while it lasted though, someday I'll see you again.

Steven'

Jackie couldn't stop crying, she knew it was selfish to do so but, she was so lost without him. She'd been so unbelievably happy to think he'd be there in the damn gigantic city with her, and now it wasn't going to happen. The loneliness hit her all over again, without Steven she had been having a tough time, she had no one to confide in, no one to tell her silly fears and worries to, no one she could trust to have her back. It had made a noticeable change in her, well – Steven would have noticed it but her parents didn't.

She fell asleep that night crying and clutching a picture of her and Steven at the carnival back in point place, she'd been smiling like a fool while he tried to look annoyed that after several failed attempts to win her the stuffed bear she'd wanted, Jackie had taken matters into her own hands and had plucked the ball out of his hands and hurled it at the milk bottles with pin point accuracy until the bear was hers at last! He'd tried his best to look annoyed and aloof but the amused grin had broken free for the picture and every time Jackie looked at it she remembered why she missed him so much – he'd do things he thought were stupid to make her happy, he'd protect her from anything even things that should have given him pause (like her parents) he didn't treat her like she was a dumb kid, he treated her like she was important, at least important to him and she would have traded everything she owned to have her friends back.

She vowed then that the moment she was done with high school she would go back to point place and Steven, she didn't care what her parents said about how Vassar was the only possible choice of school for her, she was dead set to go to UW where she could see her friends again. But until then, at least she had her letters, until she didn't.

Half way through senior year Jackie hadn't gotten a letter in months, she'd sent so many she'd lost count but Hyde wasn't responding? She was worried sick that something was wrong, or something bad had happened to him? And then it was all ok because she got a letter from Gladys!

'Jackie, just stop writing me, there's no point anymore. You don't know anything about me anymore and I don't know you, were not friends anymore, just pen pals man. See ya round or something. Hyde'

"no" Jackie whispered brokenly, how could he say that?

She waited and waited for him to write again and take back what he'd said, but it never came, she threw herself into school work because if she was studying she could forget Steven for a little while. Eventually the pain grew into anger, he had abandoned her like she had never been anything to him! All their words of friendship and devotion had been a lie on his part and she couldn't think of him without fuming. How dare he?! how dare he act like everyone else did to her?! If he could go on without her so easily, well she could too! There are some wounds that just don't heal.

Eric Forman sat in the basement, surreptitiously watching his best friend through the corner of his eye, Hyde was scowling at the tv while it innocently played a re-run of bewitched, it didn't take a genius to see that Hyde was pissed off, but it would take a world class detective to figure out why? Because he was always pissed off, it didn't take much to push him past his normal point of anger into the realm of violent outburst, then of course there was the drinking and the weed, catching Hyde sober these days was as rare as sightings of bigfoot and just as mythical.

"you ok Hyde?" Forman asked carefully

"I'm fine" Hyde growled shortly and crossed his arms without looking away from the tv, but Forman would have bet his savings that Hyde wasn't seeing a damn thing in front of him, he was lost in his head again and Forman knew that was bad – Hyde's head was more terrifying than a haunted house.

"you look mad" Forman stated neutrally, he wasn't prying simply stating facts in evidence.

"I'm always mad" Hyde responded like he always did, it had the benefit of being the truth. He was never happy anymore, the only time he smiled was when he burned someone or pulled a prank, and then it wasn't a happy smile so much as a frightening grin that made your blood run cold.

Donna looked up at her boyfriend with a raised eyebrow "what's with you Eric? He's like he always is, get nervous when he looks happy, that's when we know something weird and unnatural happened" donna laughed.

"it's just…" Forman began awkwardly "I was trying to think of the last time I saw you in a good mood and I swear the only time I could think of was like sophomore year when you got home from the carnival?" he said with a frown on his face from trying to remember back that far.

"I remember that day!" donna said brightly "we rode the Ferris wheel for the first time since you claimed that you weren't afraid of heights anymore, but you held my hand so tight I had little finger bruises the rest of the week" she teased her boyfriend fondly

"yeah well….it was a lot higher than it seemed from the ground" Eric admitted with a shrug, then scrunched his eyebrows together in thought "and you were there with that loud bratty kid you used to hang out with sometimes?" he said trying to grasp onto a more solid memory

"oh yeah! I totally forgot about that girl" donna laughed, shaking her head at what they all considered Hyde's time of temporary insanity "what was her name anyway, Jodie Birken?" she said curiously looking to Hyde, totally missing the grimace of physical pain the conversations turn had caused for him.

"no that wasn't it" Forman said shaking his head "it was Jenny Barkhat" he said with certainty

"no that's not right either" donna argued,

"why are we still talking about this?" Hyde growled dangerously "it was years ago" it was only the fact that they were his friends that was saving them from his temper lashing out.

"what else are we going to talk about?" Eric said mildly

"yeah Hyde, there's nothing wrong with a little reminiscing now that high schools over and were all about to start collage. What happened to Julie anyway? I heard she moved away to like Detroit or something" donna said, firmly hitching her wagon to the nostalgia train.

"no, no it wasn't Detroit, it was the east coast somewhere, Boston I think?" Forman said unsurely

"this conversation is over" Hyde declared barely able to contain his anger.

"oh I'm sorry, I missed the memo about you making the rules" Donna sniped at him "anyway, wherever she went I heard from pam Macey a few days ago that she got engaged to some up and coming stock broker" donna told Forman the tidbit of gossip like it was a mildly interesting anecdote about a past classmate, certainly not something should make Hyde stand up so furiously that his chair fell to the floor, and neither Eric nor donna had expected him to storm out of the basement, letting the door slam behind him.

Once he was outside alone, Hyde stopped and leaned his head against the cool concrete wall of the stairwell.

"Jackie, her name was Jackie" he whispered desolately the answer to their question. The painful pressure he woke up with in his chest everyday had grown to an unbearable level, most days it was just a dull pervading ache that kept him in a perpetual bad mood, but now it had grown to the point he had to get away, so he got in his car and gunned the powerful engine, letting the El Camino share in his feelings, before he peeled out of the driveway and sped towards the highway.

He didn't know where he was going, but he knew it was going to be somewhere that would let him forget, because he knew if he couldn't forget once and for all it would kill him, he knew this because remembering had been slowly killing him since the summer before junior year. Over two years later and it was like he had a gaping wound in his chest at all times, like his heart had been ripped out of his chest and gone to parts unknown, leaving him alone to cope with the almost debilitating pain.

"that was weird" donna noted with a raised eyebrow, she wasn't accustomed to Hyde reacting like that – she wasn't used to Hyde reacting at all to be honest.

"maybe it just wierded him out to talk about that girl he knew, after so long?" Forman theorized without conviction, he knew Hyde better than the others did and just because he lived there, Hyde was his best friend and Eric truly cared about him. He had noticed even if he never said anything, that Hyde had become worse and worse over the years, but try though he might – Forman had no idea why?

Nothing he could think of explained his friend's steady descent into the abyss, but something about the way he'd stormed out caught at Forman's brain, why had he reacted so strongly to their innocuous conversation?

What was it about Jenny Barkhat that made Hyde that mad?

"well whatever, he'll be back later and I'm sure he'll be the same as he always is, pissed off drunk and Zen" donna said disinterestedly, Hyde was Hyde, he wasn't going to change she was sure.

"I hope so" Forman said less confident than his girlfriend seemed to be about it.

Forman became less hopeful after days of Hyde's absence turned into weeks. He'd disappeared without a word or a trace, Fez and Kelso were worried as he was, only donna continued to stubbornly maintain it was just more of Hyde's bullshit.

Then, like nothing had ever happened, Hyde walked into the basement as he had a thousand times. His friends gawked at him as he took his chair like he'd only been in the kitchen to get a snack? But if he noticed their reactions he didn't let on.

"uh, hey man, wherever you been?" Forman asked in a carefully casual voice

"Vegas" Hyde answered simply, refusing to turn and meet his foster brother's eyes.

"nice!" shouted Kelso and gave Fez a high five

"Las Vegas? Uh, cool…what – what'd you do out there? Or actually no, why did you go out there in the first place?" Forman asked a little more firmly

"I was bored" Hyde said in a perfect imitation of his own Zen, but Forman spotted a difference, he couldn't place what it was, but he knew Hyde was full of it.

He was about to call him on it when the opportunity was taken from him in the form of his mother flying into the room and going crazy at the sight of her adopted son who she'd been worried half to death about. Forman wasn't going to give up this time though, he knew Hyde needed help this time – he'd needed help for a while, but this time he wasn't going to be intimidated into letting Hyde wallow in whatever misery it was that made him act the way he did now, he was going to corner him and make him talk.

Admittedly, easier said than done.

He was just about to call Hyde out in the living room a couple days later, when just before he could get Hyde to answer his question about why he'd run out of the basement only to go to Las Vegas of all places?! When the front door opened and a skinny blonde in hot pants and a halter top flounced into the room, Forman was revolted to see recognition on Hyde's face!

He'd never exactly shot for the stars with his choices in women, but he'd always avoided the slutty typhoid Mary's of the world, until now it seemed?

"Sam, what are you doing here?" Hyde asked curiously

"well I'm here because I'm your wife" the bimbo explained as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"come again?" Hyde asked blankly

"were married Hyde" the blonde told him brightly

Forman, Fez and Kelso stood waiting for their friend to send the crazy woman packing, even Kelso knew whatever this was, was not a good scene, and if Kelso could tell than surely Hyde knew?

"oh" Hyde said absently "ok" he told Sam with a shrug and offered no resistance when she wrapped her arms around him, but he didn't look happy either?

If Forman had thought that Hyde had been in a downward spiral before, it was nothing compared to now that Sam had arrived. He was never without a beer in his hand, and that was just daytime drinking, as soon as it got dark he switched to whiskey – and not the good stuff either, the cheapest rot gut available. The way he spoke to his new 'wife' was deplorable but she didn't seem to mind at all, and then of course there was the hideous mustache he'd let grow, it screamed 'I've given up on life' louder than facial hair should be able to do.

In a sickening twist of events, Donna befriended Sam and the two would chat about the sort of shallow topics Donna had found so worthy of ridicule before, like cars and shoes and how to get your way no matter what when it came to men, it was cheerleader talk and for all the disdain donna had shown for it all through school, suddenly she didn't have a problem with it?

Forman was worried about her but nowhere near as worried as he was about Hyde.

"man! I never thought I'd want a live-in stripper to go away?" Kelso said one afternoon when it was only he Fez and Forman in the basement for once.

"I know what you mean Kelso, always Fez had dreamed of having such a thing present in day to day life, I never knew how bad the reality would be" Fez agreed solemnly, learning that being around a stripper day in and day out was not the Hugh Heffner like dream he'd expected had been difficult for the young man. Also for as much as Fez and Kelso appreciated casual boobs, to their shared surprise it wasn't much fun when they belonged to someone who was supposed to be married to one of your best friends – even they had some morals.

"I'm worried about Hyde guys" Forman voiced his own fear at last.

Kelso looked at him with a more lucid expression than he usually had, and Fez stared back seriously as well.

"yeah man, us too" Kelso admitted quietly

"he no longer seems like the guy who saved me from the locker, now he seems like the sort of guy who would put me in one" Fez imparted sadly

"it's all gone wrong since Sam showed up" Kelso sighed

"I don't think she's the cause, I think she's a side effect" Forman told them thoughtfully

"he wasn't doing well for a long time, remember senior year, when he got in so many fights he was almost expelled? He started most of those fights, not like before when he'd fight to stand up for someone like me or Fez, the tiniest thing would set him off and he'd totally over react. I think…. I think something major happened and we all must have missed it?" he told them, feeling guilty that what he said sounded so very true.

"what could it have been though? After his mother left he was the same as usual, he was mad for a while but he got through it and acted like himself again, he turned into this person out of nowhere it seems?" Fez said in the same soft worried voice they'd all been using while they discussed it.

"we should investigate!" Kelso said enthusiastically

"what are you talking about Kelso?" Forman asked, without outright dismissing him

"we go and look through his room for evidence of what made him act like this, because I don't know about you but I'm getting a little tired of getting frogged for no reason, or burned for saying 'hi' when I get here! It's like Hyde is only the mean parts of him now and I miss the other parts" Kelso tried to put into words the way he felt, which wasn't easy for him.

"what could we even find in his room?" Forman asked hopelessly

"well, if we are lucky he keeps a journal that he doesn't lie in, or maybe we find something bad like drugs…hard drugs or or…. I don't know but we have to try!" Fez cried dramatically

"you both know right, that if he catches us in his room looking through his stuff, he'll do worse than frog us?" Forman pointed out seriously

"Eric, sometimes you have to risk everything for a friend" Kelso told him adamantly

"yes, that is what Kelsos fortune told him yesterday and it is already coming true!" Fez said excitedly

"fine! We're going in!" Forman cried, standing on the back of the couch and pointing at Hyde's bedroom door like an explorer of old.

They approached Hyde's room carefully, a little too carefully actually because they looked ridiculous acting so sneaky.

They each took a side of his room and began searching for anything that might give them a clue on how to help their friend. As Kelso meticulously checked every single tube sock Steven Hyde owned, Fez flipped through all his books hoping for one to be a diary in disguise, Forman stood thinking about what he knew of Hyde and what clues that gave him about where he would Hyde something personal?

He crouched down and felt under Hyde's bed until he felt the edge of the cigar box Hyde used for his stash, stealing himself for their being hard scary drugs inside – he opened the lid, inside there was…nothing? Well, there was his stash and rolling papers like you'd expect, but that was all, Forman sighed dejectedly and looked across the tiny cramped room hopelessly, they weren't going to find a magic explanation for why their friend had fallen off the tracks.

He was just about to get up and leave, when his eyes fell on the crate of records next to Hyde's arm chair, a dim long past memory of Hyde teaching him to hide the stolen playboy pages in record sleeves came to his mind and he stood up to see if old habits die hard.

He checked album after album and came up with nothing, Fez and Kelso had struck out as well and came to sit on Hyde's cot while they watched Forman search.

"isn't that your copy of Led Zeppelin 3?" Kelso asked curiously when the next album Forman had pulled out revealed the one in question.

"it was but I let Hyde keep it" he replied absently

"how come?" Fez asked curiously

"it was his…. favorite" Forman said looking up with dawning realization, in a flash he grabbed the record that had once been his until he'd seen how much Hyde loved it, and opened it with baited breath.

Inside the sleeve folded carefully next to the vinyl record, was a stack of letters on lilac stationary that smelled like the sort of perfume a young girl would wear?

"that doesn't look like something Hyde would have" Kelso noted softly

"I agree" Fez whispered, scared to death now that they'd actually found something

Forman didn't respond, instead he gathered his courage and began reading.

As he went further and further through the one-sided conversation it became painfully clear to Forman that there was a lot about their best friend they'd never noticed, the most prevalent being that he apparently had a very dear, very close friend without them realizing it. The tone of the letters changed to desperate worry around the first semester of senior year, they became pleas for an answer to the letters, some sign that Hyde was alive and well until they abruptly ended?

"do either of you remember a Jackie Burkhart?" he asked them when he finished the last letter and began putting them back exactly as he'd found them.

"no" Fez answered quickly

"big girl, bowel cut, wins all the hot dog eating contests in town?" Kelso asked frowning

"kelso, that's Rhonda" Fez points out with a roll of his eyes

"hand me that year book" Forman says pointing to the one on Hyde's shelf, Kelso obeyed and passed over their Freshmen yearbook.

Flipping through it he came to a stop finally on the page before his own picture, scanning the names on the side he finally found 'Jackie Burkhart' and stared down at the corresponding picture, it hit him like a brick wall with a vendetta – it was the loud bratty kid Hyde had hung out with at school because they had a lot of the same classes, except Forman now knew that hadn't been the case, they had been a hell of a lot closer than he'd known, and judging by the dates on the letters he'd just read, they corresponded perfectly with Hyde's change of attitude, and now that he thought of it – it was that same girl he and donna had been talking about when he'd disappeared to Vegas?!

Who was this girl to him? How could they all have missed someone being that important to their friend?

"oh yeah! I remember her, she was cute" Kelso said while leaning over to look at the yearbook over Forman's shoulder

"she was the one who wrote all those letters he had hidden" Forman informed them softly, still trying to work it all out in his head.

"they were friends, right? Remember he brought her here once and donna was really rude to her and later Hyde beat me up for hitting on her? He didn't hold back either so he must have cared about her" Kelso mused with accidental insight.

"oh my god" Forman let out a breath as it all sunk in, Hyde had lost something so important that it changed him, and none of them had noticed.

"we've got to find her" he told his friends, then glanced around where they were sitting "but first we should get out of here before he catches us and kills us" he said seriously

Nods of agreement met this suggestion, and the three scurried out of the room and out of the basement entirely, if they were going to contact this 'Jackie' person, they needed to do it somewhere where Hyde wouldn't find them – Fez's place.

Ten minutes on directory assistance and Forman had a number scribbled on a candy wrapper, with a visible gulp he dialed the number provided by the cranky operator.

"hello?" a very high feminine voice answered after three rings

"uh…hi, I'm looking for Jackie Burkhart" Forman spoke nervously

"are you selling something?" the voice asked suspiciously

"no! no, my name is Eric Forman, I live in point place Wisconsin where Jackie used to live, we went to school together" he began babbling

"I know where I went to school thank you, why are you calling me Eric?" she asked with a noticeable chill in her voice

"uh, see the thing is….um" he wasn't sure how to start?

"it's too early for our high school reunion so what do you want?" she demanded

"Hyde, I need your help with Hyde" he blurted out desperately

"help how?" she asked flatly, she did not sound happy

"he's gotten bad Jackie, he's not himself anymore, he's just mad and drunk all the time" Forman tried to put into words what had happened to their friend who had always been such a solid guy.

"I'm sorry to hear that Eric, but he made it very clear that he's not my business which means it's not my problem" she snapped

"please Jackie! Don't hang up, ok I know you guys lost touch for some reason, but I'm begging you to help us!" he cried with obvious desperation that caught Jackie's attention at last.

"tell me what's going on Forman, but I'm not promising anything" she said at last

"he's different now, mad, pissed off, cruel, somehow he's just…given up" Forman tried to explain

"details Eric! Details!" Jackie snapped forcefully

So, Eric told her everything since the last time he could clearly recall Hyde being the guy he'd always known, when he gets to the part about Hyde disappearing to Las Vegas and a stripper showing up a few days later claiming to be his wife who he married on a bender, Jackie interrupted with a shriek of 'he what?!'

"he just got up and left when we were talking about the sophomore year carnival, he didn't come back for almost a month and when he did Sam showed up a few days later with a crazy story and a marriage license" he extrapolated.

"I'll think about it" Jackie spoke so softly he hardly heard her

"you will?! Oh, thank you Jackie! You're our last hope" he told her gratefully

"whatever" she said and hung up the phone, reeling from what she'd just heard.

She had a lot of thinking to do.

The next day Forman and Kelso and Fez did their best to act normal while they all hung out in the basement like they always did, it wasn't easy.

Donna was sitting on the end of the couch so she could talk to Sam who was perched on Hyde's lap, Hyde seemed totally unaware his wife was there as he stared with blank eyes at the tv like he always did, the only sign of life in him was when he raised his beer van or his joint to his lips.

"so, did you hear back about the thing?" Kelso asked Forman in a low – but none the less carrying whisper

"what thing?" Donna asked suspiciously

"off campus housing! I'm waiting to hear if we got approved" he said in a panic and shot Kelso a warning look.

Fez leaned over when no one was looking and punched Kelso in the shoulder for talking about their plan in the present company.

"so, Hyde, how's the store doing?" Forman asked in yet another attempt to get Hyde to show any kind of reaction to anything.

"its fine" Hyde answered gruffly and with a total lack of interest like always.

"that's great to hear buddy" Forman said sarcastically, he was tired of always being the one to try and honestly, he wasn't sure how much longer he would be able to call Hyde a friend if things kept on like this.

"what's your problem Eric?" Donna asked sternly, she was fine with the status quo in the basement and couldn't really understand why Eric always seemed so upset by it?

"him! He's my problem!" Forman yelled, pointing an accusing finger at Hyde

"you got something you want to say to me Forman?" Hyde asked threateningly

"uh…." Forman gulped nervously, now that he'd gone this far he didn't know how to proceed?

He was saved by the basement door slamming open and a tiny brunette in a purple sweater and tall black boots stepped in with flashing eyes pointed straight at Hyde.

"there's something I want to say to you" she snapped dangerously, putting her hands on her hips.

"who the hell are you?" Sam asked snidely

"zip it bitch!" the new comer snapped commandingly, then turned her glare back to Hyde who was staring with open shock at her.

"you know, when they called me and told me what you'd become, but here you are drinking a beer at one in the afternoon with some skank using you like a burka lounger" she said scathingly, "where the hell do you get off living your life this way?! You are better than this Steven, you are better than 'them'! "she accused, emphasizing the word them as if she was talking about someone else not in the room?

"seriously who are you?" Donna demanded at the intruder

The flashing furious eyes turned to donna coldly "I'm not talking to you right now, I'm talking to Steven at the moment, but rest assured the – what the hell kind of friends lets this happen portion of the afternoon is coming!" Jackie hissed before taking a breath and turning back to the still stunned Hyde.

None of them had ever seen Hyde not fight back, but all he was doing was staring with wide eyed amazement at the tiny dark-haired woman, Forman almost recalled from school?

He knew it was the woman Jackie he'd called the day before, but he hadn't expected her to show up the next day and start laying into Hyde.

"I cannot believe you would let yourself become THIS! You have a fucking porn mustache! What are you thinking?! Sitting here with some stranger in a tube top wasting your life away, we might not be anything now Steven, but you are better than this!" she cried furiously, Eric saw with some relief that instead of his usual defiant expression there was one of contrite shame.

Sam got up and approached Jackie trying to look intimidating, which earned her a smirk from Jackie who wasn't anywhere near done talking.

"listen little girl, I don't know who you are or what you're doing here? But you have no right to come here uninvited and start yelling at my husband" Sam humphed at her.

"don't you dare speak to me" Jackie spoke so coldly those not involved felt scared "this has nothing to do to you, I don't even know who the hell you are and I don't give a damn either! This is between Steven and I so butt out!"

"I'm his wife so anything involving Hyde IS my business!" Sam said haughtily

"you just called your 'husband' by his last name, which unfortunately excludes you from the proceedings so why don't you sit down and just look slutty? Or better yet you could leave, which mark my words you will be doing soon enough" Jackie vowed dangerously, giving Sam a look that made her do as she'd been told and sat down, which gave Jackie an opportunity to turn her attention back to Hyde who seemed to be doing his best impression of a statue since Jackie blew into the room.

"we might not be friends anymore, and you might hate me now for moving but I still care about you and as of now – you are going to stop whatever white trash extravaganza you have planned and get your life back on track!" she ordered with an imperious tone not a lot of people could pull off.

"say it again" Hyde murmured in a tight voice, there was a look in his eyes none of his friends had ever seen before, and it was unnerving.

"you are going to fix this crap-fest of a life you've made if it's the last thing I do!" she repeated after a fashion.

"no not that part, the part about how you still care about me" he said sounding desperate?

"I still care about you Steven, and I'm not going to let yo -oomph!"

Jackie didn't get to finish her speech, because like a shot Hyde flew out of his chair and hugged her to his chest with all the strength he had, burying his face in her hair. A split second later Jackie's slender arms wrapped around him and she held him tight while she felt his chest shake with silent tears.

"I missed you so, so much jacks" he breathed into her now damp curls

"you told me we weren't friends anymore Steven" she reminded him of the reason he missed her so much

"you, being gone was killing me Jackie, every day I died more and more, I thought…I thought if I cut you off id be able to forget about you and it wouldn't hurt anymore, but it didn't work…just look at me!" he groaned sickened by his own existence.

"you're the best thing I've seen in a long time Steven, I've missed you so much I could barely stand it" Jackie wept and laughed at the same time, all the while clutching him tighter and breathing in his scent that hadn't changed in the years since she last smelled it, then she pulled away to look sternly at him

"what the hell were you thinking marrying a stripper you didn't even know?!" she demanded furiously

"like you can talk! You got engaged to a stock broker!" Hyde finally found his voice to argue with her a tiny bit.

Jackie gave him a blankly confused look "I've never been engaged and I don't even know any stock brokers" Jackie informed him totally mystified at his claim.

Hyde sneakily wiped his eyes before turning an accusing glare at donna "you told me she got engaged to a stock broker?!" he yelled, forgetting for a moment that none of his friends had any idea what Jackie was to him.

"I don't even know who this chick is!" donna cried throwing her hands into the air in defeat.

"she's Jackie Burkhart Hyde's secret important friend and pen pal" Fez supplied thoughtlessly, then realized he'd said to much and turned a nervous glance on Hyde.

"how did you find my letters?" he asked them in a deceptively soft tone that made them all cringe "and while we're on the subject, she said someone called her and asked for her help, who called her?"

Kelso made a sound like a baby chicken while Fez just opened and closed his mouth in terror, leaving Forman to explain.

"it was all of us ok! We couldn't take watching you live like this anymore so we went in your room looking for clues to why you'd grown so cold and angry, I found the letters in the led zeppelin 3 album I gave you and figured out about Jackie!" he declared defiantly

"tangerine" Jackie murmured, staring off as a memory came to her of when she declared tangerine the only good zeppelin song and made Steven play it over and over on a record he kept pointing out wasn't his and had to be returned soon.

"you really didn't forget me" she said with a watery smile

Hyde looked at her bashfully "never jacks" he told her softly, and just managed to catch her as she threw herself into his arms again.

Forman was staring quizzically at his friend and the new arrival as a question formed in his mind

"led zeppelin 3 is your favorite because of Jackie, exactly how much stuff about you that we don't understand is about Jackie?" he asked shrewdly

"all of it Forman, all of it" Hyde admitted gently, staring down at his best friend he hadn't thought he'd ever see again.

"so, I'm going to go" Sam said softly after having watched Hyde and the dainty beautiful woman's reunion, she knew when it was time to cut her losses and the soft loving tone she'd heard in her badass husband's voice was enough to tell her it was time to go back to Vegas

"no Sam, come on this is your home and your marriage!" Donna told her firmly

Sam gave donna a pitying look "thanks donna, but even if we were legally married I'm not up for fighting against that" she said gesturing to where Hyde was still holding Jackie against his chest like if he let go she'd disappear.

"I don't know what that is Sam" donna said giving the two a slightly disgusted look "but you're important to Hyde and you can't just give up on your marriage" donna counseled her seriously, as if she hadn't seen the last half hour unfold?

"donna that's nice of you, really naive, but nice. I'm fine really, tell Hyde I'll write him to explain everything, something tells me its better if I go before he comes to" she said and gave a parting wave before walking out the door for good, leaving them all with only the sight of Hyde holding Jackie like a life line.

"I can't watch you leave again" Hyde told her in a stricken voice "anything Jackie, I'll do anything you ask if you just stay" he pleaded in a very un-Hyde like manner

"I'm here to help you Steven, so let's see what I can do about what you've let slide so long and then we'll talk about me" she told him seriously, but with a warmth he'd sorely missed.

"I'm a total mess Jackie, it's going to take a long time" he told her honestly and a little ashamed of how far he'd fallen.

"then I'll be here for a long time Steven, listen to me and hear me – you are my priority right now, everything else is just details" she said sternly and kissed his cheek.

"that was a good call Forman" Kelso whispered to his friend

"I'll say" Forman agreed still a bit stunned.

A/N don't worry it's not over yet


	4. Chapter 4

It was three AM, and Jackie was still unable to sleep. It had been the single craziest day she had ever had in all 19 years of her life. She was back in point place, she had seen and touched and smelled Steven Hyde – something she never thought would happen again – and she could hardly believe it was real. Funny how when she had first answered the phone and spoken to Eric Forman she hadn't been inclined at all to go back to Wisconsin and try to help the boy who had hurt her more than anyone else ever had, but it hadn't even taken 24 hours for her to decide to come there to help him if she could.

A rushed packing of a suitcase and hours after she'd hung up the phone she was on a plane back to her childhood home and the best friend she'd ever had.

But Steven Hyde had been more than her best friend, he had been her family and then he'd dropped her like she was nothing. It had cut her open and never truly healed, she knew it had made her colder, more cynical but she didn't really care, in fact she didn't really care about anyone after his last letter.

Sure, there were people she spent time with in New York, people that she even referred to as 'friends' but she didn't actually care about them the way she remembered caring about people when she was younger, she was fine on her own. Or at least she liked to pretend she was.

But the truth was she hadn't been fine since they uprooted her and dragged her away from the only person she'd given a damn about, she had never been able to forget her best friend, no matter how much it pained her to think about him he was always there in the back of her mind each and every day. She would do her best to ignore the memories of him trying to break free when she saw or heard something that reminded her of him, but more nights than she cared to admit she would stare into the darkness of her room and let the memories of their time together wash over her, it was comfort and pain all mixed together.

And now there she was, laying in a double bed with scratchy sheets in the best motel point place had to offer, which was still pretty crappy, trying to figure out how she was going to help Steven?

Eric had been right – there were serious problems. She had been able to smell the booze on him, as well as more than one kind of smoke, his clothes had been rumpled like he'd slept in them, and he hadn't looked like he'd taken care of himself at all for who knew how long? The drinking worried her a lot, she remembered Edna vividly and shuddered at the thought of those genes kickstarting in him.

To be honest – all of what she'd seen worried her, and she wasn't sure where to start or how to approach it all? She only really knew two ways to accomplish things – talk until she got what she wanted or throw money at it – but something told her that Steven would be more complicated than anything she'd come up against before. He had always been able to see right through her methods, but she was going to give it everything she had this time.

She turned over and tried to get comfortable enough to sleep but her brain was still in overdrive trying to figure out what the best course of action was? It was tempting to just knock him out and drag him back to New York where there was no basement to help him hide from the world and no old friends to enable his bad habits because they couldn't see the forest for the trees.

Jackie sat up with a start.

"the basement!" she breathed out, it fell into place in her mind like a latch sliding home.

The first step was to physically remove him from that freakin' grimy basement.

Not back to New York, and not ban him permanently or anything, but he was a grown ass man who owned a record store, he could live in an apartment like an adult instead of remaining in the stasis he'd created down there.

Satisfied with the first step she'd decided on, Jackie finally fell into a deep sleep which brought dreams of her past in that very town.

Down in that same basement she'd been thinking of, Steven Hyde sat in the arm chair in his small bedroom, a single candle providing the only light. He had been getting ready for bed but had stopped in the middle and sat down in the chair in nothing but his second least decrepit pair of jeans. Even his shades sat on his dresser across the room from him. he knew he should finish changing and go to sleep, but all he could do was listen to the music playing softly from his old portable record player and try not to drown in the memories swamping his mind.

Jackie was back.

When she had first blown into the basement like the hurricane he knew she could be, he'd thought he'd finally lost it, one to many trips had fried his brain for real. But then she'd started yelling at him (and everyone else in her path) and he'd known then that she was real – only the real Jackie could hit that pitch. Eric and the others had found her and pleaded for her to come help with him, that alone was upsetting – that he'd gotten bad enough they had to go full on Columbo to have a hope of helping him – but the fact that she'd shown up was downright incredible.

After what he'd done he couldn't believe she would show up to help him straighten out, much less hug him with the expression he'd seen up close, she still cared about him even after he'd told her they weren't friends anymore.

"I'm such a tool" he muttered darkly when he recalled what he'd said to Jackie in that letter,

The candle flickered, making the shadow that fell across his bare torso twist and flutter, he badly wanted a drink but knew that had to end. He wasn't stupid even if he acted like it more often than not, and he was positive that his excessive drinking was not going to go over well with Jackie.

He could feel the pull of long-term habit clawing up in his chest and trying to dominate his mind, the more he told himself he didn't want to walk to the fridge and grab a beer, the more the urge to do so grew. He swallowed thickly and pushed the itch down. He would absolutely not meet Jackie again with a hangover!

Accept his leg was jumping with anxious energy, and his fist was clenched on the arm of the chair while the other propped up his head. It was going to be a long night.

The song ended for the tenth time that night, and for the eleventh time Hyde reached over and brought the needle back to the beginning, it had been years since he had been able to listen to tangerine and he was making up for that all in one night. Now that she was back in his life the song was soothing again instead of bitterly painful, he was dreading the questions that Jackie was sure to ask the next day when they met, there was no way for him to explain what he'd done to his life without having to tell her things he wasn't sure he was up to saying?

He was man enough to admit that part of why he didn't want to tell her the whole truth was because he was ashamed of a lot of the choices that he'd made, but another big part of it was he didn't want her to feel responsible for his bad choices, but he knew she would to a degree. Because there would be no way for him to tell the truth while also leaving her out of it all, she was a major factor in his existence even then after so many years apart, and he hated the idea that she would hear his deepest secrets and blame herself.

It wasn't her fault, he needed for her to understand that before he leveled with her completely, his bad choices were his own and even if some of them could be linked back to her it was still wholly on his shoulders. But Jackie didn't usually see things that way, she had always made up her mind about a situation and changing said mind was difficult to do.

He let out another heavy sigh and scrubbed his face with his palms, his entire being was exhausted and all he wanted to do was sleep, but he knew that was still far away from him. on the up side, he figured that if he was loopy from sleep deprivation maybe having an honest conversation with Jackie the next day would be easier?

Sadly, that was his first remotely hopeful thought in several years.

Jackie's internal clock would have put the finest swiss watches to shame, at 7am on the dot she was sitting up in her sub-par bed and rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. She may have gotten only a few measly hours of sleep under her belt, but Jackie Burkhart had energy to spare and this was one of the times it came in handy. She didn't feel near as horrible as most people would only sleeping for around three hours, she got up and stretched to ease the kinks in her back caused by sleeping in a strange bed and headed for the shower.

She was in no hurry that morning, she might not have seen or talked to Steven Hyde in years, but she was certain he hadn't magically become a morning person in that time. so, she took her time in the shower letting it gradually wake her up to a level of functional reasoning, when she was done she searched through her clothes carefully. She needed to appear in that damn basement again looking a certain part, too fancy and they would scoff at her as an outsider, too dressed down and she wouldn't command their attention the way she needed to.

Be cynical about clothes all you want, but Jackie knew that people's minds made connections and assumptions based on visuals, and she was a master of manipulating those reactions to make people see what she needed them to see. The problem with her mission that day was deciding what she wanted them to see?

Did she want to achieve the Florence nightingale effect? A caring nurturer of the sick and hopeless. Or did she want to intimidate those present into doing what she said? If she was being honest she wanted to scream at a few of her ex-classmates again, and then steal Steven away never to deal with point place again, but Eric Forman didn't deserve that treatment, he had cared when it wasn't easy, he had seen what so many others were happy to ignore, and he had taken the mother of all hail Mary's in tracking her down to help his friend, so unfortunately leaving wasn't an option.

Finally, Jackie decided on black jeans and tall black leather boots and a plain but well-made teal top, she wanted to come across as classy and put together without it being obvious, a carefully constructed messy updo completed the whole thing and it was only 9:30.

She knew Steven wouldn't be awake yet, but the same could have been said at noon so she wasn't too worried about it, she also had no problem waking him up unceremoniously, hell she'd dump water on him if that's what it took.

She grabbed her bag off the small table near the door and paused when something caught her eye, with a smirk she snatched a complimentary orange out of the bowel and tossed it in her bag, then headed out the door to deal with a situation she barely understood.

Jackie must have sat in her rental car staring at the house she needed to enter for close to ten minutes before she forced her legs to move and take her forward. She barely remembered most of the people that hung out there, and one of them was a total stranger, but what she did recall of Kelso and Donna wasn't good.

She remembered Donna as a stuck-up bitch who thought she was better than everyone because she wrote stories that the school paper published, Jackie could remember being impressed with that back then too, not the stories so much as the courage to put something you'd done out there for everyone to see. But she wasn't 14 anymore, and it took a lot more to impress her than it had back then. She also recalled that Kelso had been far too pushy when he had interest in her for no other reason than she was a girl in his immediate vicinity, but he had been part of the team to track her down, so she would be civil.

She took a deep calming breath before opening the door to the basement and having to face whatever she found down there. she wasn't afraid of his friends being jerks, she was expecting that frankly, she was afraid – down right terrified actually – that no matter what she did she wouldn't be able to help Steven turn his life around.

He was so much more than he'd let himself become, and it was about time that he changed that.

She stepped inside the basement and was hit with slightly stale air like she'd been expecting, she also saw four sets of eyes staring openly at her, also as she'd been expecting.

"good morning is Steven asleep still?" she asked politely if a bit cold.

"why are you here so early?" donna asked with a roll of her eyes "Hyde won't be up for hours and I'm sure we could have him call you when he gets up" she added in a tone that made it seem as if Jackie was an idiot for being there at all.

"I don't see how anything between Steven and I is any of your business really? He asked for me to be here and that's all that matters to me" Jackie informed donna evenly, she kept all emotion out of her voice as showing emotion to someone like donna was showing weakness.

Everyone watched as Donna began to draw herself up to give an angry retort, but it was Eric that cut it off in a rare moment of courage towards Donna.

"his room is in the back there, its not easy to wake him up but if you need water there's a bathroom across from his room" he told Jackie helpfully

Jackie gave him a small smile and thanked him with actual warmth before telling them all to keep their distance while she talked to Hyde.

If the air had been a bit stale out in the main room of the basement, it was downright oppressive in Hyde's tiny bedroom! It was a nauseating mixture of socks, sweat and something else her mind rebelled from putting a name to, forcing herself not to gag and run Jackie slammed the door behind her and walked to the cot Hyde was passed out on. He was on his stomach with one leg hanging off the edge and one arm over his head while the other was sticking out from under him at an odd angle.

When she sat on the edge of his cot to decide how best to wake him up, Jackie realized that the worst of the smell was coming from him and it wasn't just normal sweat, she felt tears prick her eyes when she realized that he was sweating out alcohol.

It was worse than she had thought.

"Steven, Steven wake up" she said with firm kindness and awkwardly shook him by the shoulder.

He didn't respond in the slightest.

Jackie sighed and tried again a little louder and with a harder shake to his shoulder – still nothing.

She didn't want to admit defeat or go get water to douse him with since it would be confirmation that she needed help, granted that was a ridiculous belief, but she would not give donna any ammunition to mock her or her presence there!

Crossing her arms, Jackie looked down at Stevens prone form and thought about her options. A devilish smile curled her lips and she reached out one long glittering fingernail to poked him in the one ticklish spot he had – the armpit.

His whole body jerked away as he grumbled something into his pillow, but she wasn't deterred and reached out again to tickle him mercilessly until finally a pair of ice blue eyes opened to stare accusingly at her, the accusation faded as recognition dawned on him.

"Jackie? Uh… hi?" he said, his voice still thick with sleep.

"morning'" she replied with a bright smile

Hyde just stared at her while his brain woke up fully, he half thought that she was a dream or hallucination (he'd hallucinated her once or twice on a bender) and it was hard for him to accept that she was really there in his dingy little room sitting on the edge of his uncomfortable cot.

She didn't belong in a place like that and he felt a surge of self-loathing that he had dragged her into such a crappy place,

"sorry the place is such a dive, I haven't gotten around to cleaning up in…awhile" he apologized while struggling into a sitting position.

"its fine, especially since I don't plan on having to come here again" she told him casually

"you're leaving already?" he asked sounding terrified and angry all at once.

Jackie raised one brow curiously at him "did I say that?" she demanded flatly "no I did not, so don't try to put words in my mouth Steven because I have enough of my own in there!"

"well, what did you mean then?" he asked greatly subdued by her anger

"I'm not leaving, but you sure as hell are" she told him bluntly

"huh?" was his articulate response

"you're a grown man Steven, you own a store, you own a car, you graduated high school, you shouldn't be living in a basement like a kid, I'm not trying to be mean – I really need you to understand that is not how I mean what I'm telling you" she told him seriously

"the foreman's- "he began to explain his reluctance to do what she was saying, but Jackie cut him off with a pointed look and a hand held up.

"the foreman's will be proud of you for growing up, they don't really see you that much right now anyway from what I've heard, maybe if you didn't live here you'd actually be compelled to spend time with them without the excuse of them being upstairs. Apartment hunting starts today" she decreed imperiously

"uh, about that" Hyde began hesitantly earning a suspicious look from Jackie "there's an apartment above grooves, its just not currently livable" he admitted

"like 'doesn't have running water' unlivable, or 'used for storage' unlivable?" she asked with narrowed eyes.

"more along the lines of needing a hell of a lot of work to be inhabitable, its dirty and run down and has been empty for a very long time unless you count a family of racoons?" he explained with a yawn, he really hadn't slept enough he realized, the foggy feeling in his head wouldn't go away.

"then after you shower and we get some coffee in you that's where were heading, we will find out what that place needs for you to move in, we will make a detailed list of every last thing you would need and then – we get to work" she told him with her arms crossed for emphasis to how serious she was.

"what about the rest of it?" he asked in a small voice that was surprising coming from him, he had always been so confident before.

"I'm afraid you'll have to be a little more specific than 'the rest of it' I don't want to sound cruel, but that encompasses a lot of things" Jackie said simply, she didn't want to elaborate and risk bogging him down in all his problems.

"when you've let your whole life turn to crap its kinda hard to narrow it down" Hyde told her wryly

"well how about the thing you'd like to deal with first?" Jackie offered kindly

"I didn't have a drink all night after you left last night…it hurt" Hyde admitted with difficulty, the shame evident in his voice and demeanor. He'd known he drank too much, he hadn't known he had let it get so far as to be painful not to drink.

"I wish that surprised me Steven, but it doesn't. I've listed rehab as an option, but the thing about those places is that they only work if you want them to work, if I got you into one against your will it wouldn't do a damn bit of good. Do you understand what I'm saying to you?" she asked softly, her face grave.

"that I have to agree to changing and mean it" Hyde responded just as softly.

"I have a plan Steven, its pretty good too as long as you're on board, but you have to really really want to do it. go take a shower and when you're out we'll go out and get started" she told him kindly and shocked the hell out of him by leaning in and hugging him tightly, then murmuring into his shoulder "god you smell awful" in a misty voice.

"it's a guy thing" he claimed with a smirk

"no Steven, that kind of smell is a hobo thing, go wash it off – lots of soap Steven, I paid a deposit on that rental car and I don't want to lose it because it comes back smelling like cooked garbage" she snapped commandingly at him.

Hyde just smiled at the bossy tone he hadn't heard in far too long.

He was a little queasy during his shower when he happened to glance down and see that the water had a definite beige tint to it, how long had he gone without remembering to shower? And why hadn't anyone else pointed out that he stunk?

Unfortunately, he knew the answer, those that would have noticed wouldn't have wanted to set off his temper, and those that didn't care about that weren't interested enough to notice. His head fell against the tiles of the stall with a dull thunk, in the clear light of day he couldn't believe he'd let things get this bad.

The simple fact that Forman of all people had braved rifling through his belongings in hopes of finding a way to help him spoke volumes about how pathetic he'd let himself get. He felt a slight tremor in his hands but shrugged it off as nerves at seeing Jackie again.

It took him a little while to find clean clothes, partly because he hadn't been doing his laundry regularly and Sam sure as hell didn't, and partly because when he went back into his room wrapped in a towel, he found Jackie still sitting in there but now in his less sweat soaked arm chair. He'd been expecting her to have left to the other part of the basement, but there she was reading a rolling stone he'd left on his table and looking severely out of place.

"uh, Jackie I kinda need to change" he pointed out awkwardly

Jackie simply turned her back to where he stood and continued flipping the pages of the magazine, she had no intention of leaving.

"I don't have beer hidden in the dresser Jackie" Hyde told her, half joking half trying to avoid being naked in the same room as someone he hadn't spoken to in years.

"if I go back out there ill probably slap the bleach blonde, its better I stay here so get dressed quickly ok?" she informed him darkly.

"what'd donna do to piss you off?" Hyde asked curiously, while trying to pull boxers on under his towel.

"not everyone gets along Steven, I didn't think much of her in junior high and time hasn't improved her, I'm also not to impressed with anyone that watched you spiral to the point of marrying a hooker without saying a word" she told him flatly, but it spoke volumes to Hyde – she was not going to allow any excuses for how he'd become, and she was going to call him out on all of it.

"she wasn't a hooker" Hyde pointed out absently while he dug through the pile of t-shirts mrs Forman had brought down a few days before.

"like I care" Jackie drawled contemptuously

Hyde didn't respond, which he knew was safer.

"so, uh, what have you been up to? Going to college and…stuff?" he tried to shift the conversation off himself for at least a few minutes, besides he was genuinely curious about what she'd been up to.

"yep, just finished my second year at Columbia" she said blankly

"do you like it there?" he asked like he figured normal people would

"it's a means to an end" Jackie replied shortly

"I get the feeling you don't want to talk about this?" Hyde said curiously

"I don't" Jackie answered simply, and even after so long apart Hyde knew when to not push the small brunette, she would tell him when she wanted him to know and she did not want him to know at that moment, whether because she didn't want to talk about herself while they set about getting him on his feet, or because she didn't want to talk about it in general, he didn't know.

Jackie didn't even stop to listen to the questions from his other friends about where they were going, and Hyde didn't want to have to chase her down again, so blew past them as well. He climbed into the passenger's side of Jackie's rental car, noting how similar it was to the foreman's Toyota while also how weird it was to not be the driver, while Jackie backed out of the drive and sped away towards downtown.

He decided to bypass grooves and take Jackie up to the apartment the back way, saying good morning to Leo could turn into a two-hour debate about what 'good' really meant and he just wasn't up to it.

Hyde already had a key to the place since he was the owner and opened the door while simultaneously bracing for Jackie's shriek of disgust, but it never came.

She walked inside past him and began looking around the decent sized room, the kitchen area was across from them, at least that's where you could make out the shapes of a fridge and a stove, apart from that it wasn't very kitchen-y. her expression was thoughtful as she perused the cluttered dusty and somewhat smelly room, against his advice she crossed to the door on the other end and opened it – this time she did shriek and Hyde had to jump out of the way of three plump racoons who were racing out of the nearest exit – the front door. He watched them with a grin as they scuttled down the staircase to the alley and disappeared.

"there were racoons Steven!" Jackie screamed from the doorway to what he figured was the 'bedroom'

"I'm pretty sure I mentioned that before" he pointed out mildly

"I thought you were exaggerating to make a point about how bad this place was! Racoons aren't the friendliest animals, one of them hissed at me!" she informed him furiously

He wasn't sure if the fury was to mask her fear, or because a racoon had to audacity to hiss at her?

"are there any more in there?" he asked while picking up a scrap of wood to shoo them out if there were.

"no, that was all of them, now its just us the spiders and the mice I'm sure live here too, when's the last time a human occupied this place?" she asked looking around with distaste at the piles of rubbish and dust covered boxes mixed with scrap.

"dunno? Something like three years" he said with a shrug,

"does your store have and office with a phone? I need to make a few calls to get this sorted" she told him seriously, she was on a mission, and he wasn't stupid enough to stop her.

Hyde took her downstairs again and shuffled through paper work while Jackie commandeered his phone, she called her school and told them in no uncertain terms that she was taking a leave of absence because of a family emergency and to put her on hiatus until she contacted them, she called her mom and made a few threats of blackmail after her mom ordered her home with threat of being cut off, Jackie was deadly serious when she informed her mom that if she tried to do that or really make any move against her, Jackie would tell her father a few things that pam really really didn't want to explain, her mother caved instantly.

After those calls, she grabbed his phone book and flipped to the yellow pages, Hyde got called to the floor to answer a question about when a new record was being released and missed what Jackie was calling them about, he returned for her happily telling them the time to arrive somewhere?

"what was that?" Hyde asked curiously

"I hired some people to come clear all that crap out of your new place" she explained absently as she scribbled on a pad of paper.

"you didn't have to do that Jackie" he tried to tell her, feeling again like he wasn't near good enough for a friend like her.

"don't mention it, besides, they're clearing all the junk out, but the cleaning is just you and me" she told him with a raised brow for any objections he may decide to raise.

"whatever you say jacks" he told her softly and followed her out the door when she decreed they needed to go pick out cleaning supplies at the store.

She wasn't wasting any time and he didn't want to argue.

A/N hello, I doubt anyone still remembers this story but I have a soft spot for it and finally had a vacation where I could write something, so here's another chapter, and there's still a bit more to come. Hope someone out there likes this chapter.


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